I'm a virgin.

dominate me

Life Gets Bumpy

Why are your armpits so sweaty?

Smurfette Slut

"Yes, she was a dirty whore." - Paul from work

Beastiality

"That's cute!" - Barbara from work

Directions: Poop Splash Flush

"That's really gross." - Everyone

I invented Post-Its.

"How's business?" - Scott Lowe

Hungry children eat bugs.

I have a reservation.

Gay for Pay.

"Yeah, I guess everything can be commodified."
- Leah in my globalization class.

Don't get it in my eye

"Don't get what in your eye?" - Travis from work

"I might have to do something I've never done before--Vote Republican." - Man at the Mexican restaurant at the University of Utah

I Ruv Fry Rye

"You love what?" - Coworker